Threesome Question

**EHB** · 05-14-2007, 05:19 PM

LOL
After reading some of the posts, I feel that I will need another trip in a few months. May see you in August! One simply isn't enough for the vets, and after June, I WILL BE A TRUE HEDO VET! Thanks for the advice. It seems like no matter what, someone is going to feel some sort of way about being approached. Whether it is the male or the female part of the couple, feelings may get out of sort. If I am attracted to the Woman, and not the Man, does that mean that I should forget about her? I mean, what if she's my type and he is not?!?!? I am beginning to realize that I may be better suited for the Wild Women's group. No questions. Everyone knows what the other wants. Simply find someone who suits you.

**uknewbies** · 05-14-2007, 05:31 PM

Ebony, I am sure that your wishes will be respected and accepted by many. Don't worry about it. Oh and by the way, think you need to come between 23rd July and 6th August with us. Our little group is better than the WWW. We already have a secret handshake, we just need a name now lol

**EHB** · 05-14-2007, 09:25 PM

I have met so many great people on the boards. Everyone seems to be going or coming, but none are there during my trip. I am certainly going to come to the board and travel with some of the fun people! Would love to hear more about the group... Hedo groups with secret looks, handshakes, open legs... Whatever... I WANT IN! LOL Everyone seems to think that it is so easy for Women to find what they are looking for at Hedo. Perhaps that is the case. I am a Newbie, and clueless... in a good way. Don't want to stray too far off topic here. Would love a threesome. Honestly, the more women, the merrier! No expectations, but don't want to offend if someone tickles my fancy.

**A+J** · 05-15-2007, 03:16 AM

Ye Ebony, you really should try the Wild Women. It's great.
We'll be there in November

**Moorerotic** · 05-15-2007, 06:40 AM

Ebony

The approach is not where the problem lies. Even if you carpet bombed Hedonism with offers and still came back with a lot of "Hell, No's" (highly unlikely) you still would never be deemed a female Vinny. Because you're female don't stress about the approach whether it's in your face or subtle. You'll be cut a ton of slack.

It's easy for women to find what they want IF THEY PURSUE IT. Hedonism and the lifestyle world in general seem to be set up to cater to female comfort at the expense of female and male pleasure. As a result many of the men at Hedonism take on an unnaturally submissive, and to most women slightly unattractive role.

This is why the I might like her by not him situation occurs. The guy is hiding his true self because as I said earlier, he doesn't want to get throw out of the kitchen, so his true self doesn't shine. You'd find more attractive whole couples if the dude's would simply "man up".

None of this is really your problem because there will still be ton of guys who will be overjoyed to simply sit in the corner and watch you get intimate with their woman. If you want to kick the guy out of the room completely then you should go for the Wild Women thing.

The problem will be after the act and you may not even be aware of it. The wife may wait until the couple is back home to bitch slap the hubby.

**A+J** · 05-15-2007, 06:45 AM

Wild Women don't kick the man out of the room. Well mine doesn't thankfully..........

**EHB** · 05-15-2007, 08:26 AM

Moorerotic: LOL Well stated...
You totally understand what I am saying. A female 'Vinnie' is not what I want to be tagged as. I am more on the sexy glances and brushing up against a body type of Woman. Board members have written, on several occasions, that you have to be up front and somewhat aggressive at Hedo. I suppose that my trepidation comes from the fact that I am used to being pursued. The times that I am the agressor, I tend to be quite blunt and to the point. Hedo appears to have alot of unwritten rules and various groups / sects which govern a whole different set of rules and regulations. New ground here. Venturing out of my comfort zone. Like in all other areas of my life, I will find my niche, and will be great!

Question: Why would the wife wait until the couple is back home to bitch slap the hubby?

**Uniflip** · 05-15-2007, 09:15 AM

I'm not kicking my partner out the room!! Nor anyone else's for that matter. I wouldn't go with the Wild Women group if that was the case.

(I know it's not)

Uni.

**uknewbies** · 05-15-2007, 10:41 AM

Ebony, those people who talk about being aggressive are normally male. Us girls know that the best way to get want we want is to be subtle, flirty and patient. Don't worry about it hun, just be yourself and go about it your way.
A&J, who is talking about kicking men out of the room?? Our group love our men and want them to have a fab experience at Hedo too. Chairs will be available in the room and iced red stripe on tap, what more could they ask for?? lol

**Moorerotic** · 05-15-2007, 11:25 AM

Ebony

That was essentially the point I was trying to make. Hedo turns the traditional male pursuer/female pursued dynamic on it's head to some degree. I don't think that's a good thing and I don't believe it's what women truly want.

In a female to female situation SOMEBODY has to be the pursuer! If you want someone be ready to pursue, it definitely won't be looked down upon.

Actually I did see a couple of women hit their men in public. Most love taps were behind closed doors, though and you just saw the guy with a bruise. The minority probably waited until they got back home.

Hedo-type interactions can bring out the hidden side of people.

For instance, my swinger buddy tried to get his prude wife to swing for several years. No deal. Finally she decides she's go with him to a club and just do girl-girl. Instead she did a 15 guy gangbang her first night, and she's now the go to girl for DPs in their swinger circle. He could have freaked but he rolled with it.

Years ago I had a threeway with my best friend and his wife. She was willing to let me have her anally (again that beautiful surrender thing) but not her husband of seven years (we both have about the same size dicks so that's not the issue). He freaked. He didn't bitch slap her but it still makes him mad to this day.

You get the basic idea. If one partner steps way outside of what the other partner expects problems CAN but may not arise. Commence the bitch slappin'. This is not a problem if you stick with veteran swingers, but veteran swingers are in the minority at Hedo.

Always remember because you're female you'll be cut a ton of slack.

Definitely step out of your comfort zone. I call it the one inch of fear.

Once you get to Hedo don't openly stress about any of this. It's very unattractive.

I'll give you a quick example that hopefully won't bring out the hate mail.

I went to Hedo last year about 25-30lbs overweight. I store all my weight in my belly and it doesn't look good. I spend way too much time complaining about how I should have come to Hedo slimmed down. I'll sure the complaining dropped my attractiveness score and cost me some fine lovin'. The bottom line is that once I was there and couldn't change it, I should have walked around as though I had the most beautiful belly in the world.

Stress all you want now about subtle vs. aggressive and pursue vs. pursued, but when you step on Hedo property let all that go, and just do it, like those shoe people say.

**Miamicpl05** · 05-15-2007, 04:24 PM

moorerotic -- i just have to say i truly enjoy reading your posts.

you are so clear and precise and to-the-point. and the way you tell things makes all the sense in the world.

i have to tell you, i am really bummed that you won't be at hedo when we are because i think that if nothing else, you would be fantastic company for conversation and laughs! (and i'd sure give you a little action! haha!

)

i'll be sure to toast you when we're there....join me, uk & john/anita?

**Uniflip** · 05-15-2007, 04:29 PM

Nooooo... Moorerotic is coming in Nov with us and J+A, juiciberri and Rockers n rollers!! (well he's thinking about it, I hope....)

Then Ebony can book too.. what a week it would be!!

**Miamicpl05** · 05-15-2007, 04:31 PM

so can't we all share him???? isn't that what hedo is all about????

moorerotic -- you want to be shared, right????

**EHB** · 05-15-2007, 09:43 PM

What I realize is this:

The closer I get to my trip, the more hours per day I am spending on the boards...

The more I am reading trip reports and looking at pictures and doing comparisons.

Please do not take my posts / venting as anything other than that.

It is a delicate marinade of delirious anticipation and excitement over the possibility of wanton, hedonistic delight.

I do not doubt that people will be attracted to me.

I like to think of myself as attractive inside and out...

I am an African American (Ebony Beauty ) Natural Woman.

Not Natural as in I do not bathe - my scent is an aphrodisiac.

What I mean is not surgically (cosmetically) altered.

I am intelligent, successful, secure and truly love my life. I think I am funny and compassionate.

Hell, I am going to H2 & H3 ALONE (sans S.O., friends or travel groups). There is a high level of confidence there…

On the real, I have moments when I am not as self-assured as I should be. There are days when the level is not as high as I would prefer…

Hey! I'm human, and not ashamed of it!

It would be sad for someone to think less of me for being myself and being honest enough to bear all, figuratively on the boards, and literally at Hedo!

I came here to get to know others, and for others to get to know me...

The ME that is not always on top of her game...

The ME who can work a bustier like no other...

The ME who is confident enough to state her personal physical 'quirks' publicly...

The ME who is... well ME

Thanks for reading. See you at the bar...

I'll be celebrating MY birthday in MY birthday suit!!!!!

Anyone for Birthday Suit Body Shots?!?!?